Friday, July 21, 2006

Come on, cut me some slack

I screw up sometimes. I'm not even going to lie. But I mean really. Am I not human? I am. And I'm ok with that.

Had a minor snafu with the car. I just have to learn to apply more caution to my driving. A little more caution and a little less speed.

I'm writing a story. Do I know the ending already? Yes. I don't really know how I'm going to get there though. But I'm sure I can figure it out. It'll be interesting to journey with this book. I'm going to have to warn myself to cut me some slack though. I tend to be overly critical of myself at times and that's never good. I'm not sure why I'm that way. It could be because I'm always striving to be good enough for someone. I wouldn't have to always do this if I wasn't always attaching my emotions to people that are never going to find me adequate because they don't care about me enough to look for any good. I'm talking about people like "Mary". And a few other people. I'm not important to some folks that are important to me. That shouldn't be but it is. So I'm stuck with what I've got.

It's not all that bad though right? Right. I have a besty that rocks. I'm going to be ok. I don't know when but I will. Hopefully before I croak. Cause that would be fucked up. To find my happy and then die? Ugh.

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